How to Deal with the Ex Wife that Affects Your New Relationship

16.04.2020

A guy and a girl love each other and have a relationship. But suddenly, a man’s ex-wife appeared and decided to make her adjustments: since he’s no longer with her, then no one gets him. She gets involved in their relationship, constantly calls, annoyingly imposes her society, says to the guy all sorts of nasty things about his current woman, and inspires the girl that he still loves his ex or even that he visits single ladies dating sites. Does it seem familiar to you?

Well, a breakup or even divorce is always painful, especially if this didn’t happen according to your wishes. And before we finally forget the ex-partners, we go through the tormenting circles of hell in the hope of bringing them back. Some time passes, and we return to life’s track. But after months, years, a bitter ex-wife may suddenly begin to remind about herself, offers to meet and spend time together. But what to do in such a situation? And how to deal with a bitter ex-wife?

Understand the Problem: Why Your Ex Wife Causing Problems

A breakup is a complex emotional process that women experience more difficult than men. So, don’t be angry at your ex. Try to first understand her motives.

1. You are her plan B

To a greater degree, relationships are stability and a certain comfort zone. Having had criticism in relationships and finally broken up, a woman thought that she would find someone better. But over time, she already wants a completely different thing: to get married, have children, that is, return to her comfort zone. Returning, the ex no longer feels the feelings that she had before, although she can say the opposite to you.

2. She can’t accept the fact that you’re happy

A sense of ownership is inherent not only to men but also to women. Perhaps, she notices that your life is getting better: you have dealt with a breakup almost completely and found a new girl. And here she is, your ex-wife. And she appears not to be happy but rather spoil your life. How to handle ex-wife drama? Even if your breakup was mutual, you remained friends, but you don’t consider the possibility of renewing the relationship, then think carefully about why she is doing this right now.

3. She wants to get everything back

Maybe her new relationship was also not successful. She broke up with a guy and now thinks of you. The ex wants you to be together again. Therefore, she wants to find out whether you miss her or not. When she analyzes your reaction to her, she will be able to conclude for herself if she should try to get everything back or move on without you.

4. She wants to revenge

Solving bitter ex-wife problems, you may understand that she just wants to revenge. She decides to ruin the life of her ex-man. Thus, she tries to express how painful she is and wants you to experience it yourself. Thus, the ex depicts the role of the victim. Only weak-willed women are capable of this step. Self-sufficient people don’t take revenge and adequately leave.

5. She has a sense of ownership

An ex-wife, causing problems, considers that she owns you even after a breakup. Men, having broken up with their women, consider them strangers and try to erase them from memory. And women don’t forget men who took a long part of their lives, and to the point of absurdity, they are sure that they will always be taken back if they want.

Main Signs of a Vindictive Ex-Wife

Vindictive women act stealthily, but today we want to tell you 10 ways about how they manipulate us so that you can spot them in time.

1. She has a lack of empathy

Lack of empathy is characteristic of vindictive women. This doesn’t mean that they don’t show sympathy for some close people, but when anger appears, empathy disappears. Studies show that when a woman wants to hurt her ex-man, she considers him a threat. Try to remember how your ex-woman usually behaved. You should know how to deal with a manipulative ex-wife.

2. She makes you unsure

Another way to manipulate you is to make you doubt your strength. This can be achieved with the help of regular criticism of your words and actions, lies, various kinds of manipulations, and hypocrisy. If such women manage to undermine your self-confidence, then they automatically look more successful, interesting, and psychologically strong.

3. She has a weak ability to self-knowledge

These women are usually with poor emotional self-knowledge who are not able to determine when they feel angry and when they are about to explode with anger. Resentment makes women unhappy, and instead of focusing on themselves and accepting the situation, it makes them live in a vicious circle in which they must hurt another person.

4. She has poor emotional control

We all experienced severe pain from time to time and wanted the person who provoked it to suffer as well, but not all of us acted so because we know that it doesn’t bring us any benefit and may harm us. But a vindictive ex-wife will not spare anyone. An ex-man is now like a red rag to a bull.

5. She likes to project her feelings on you

Such women are full of complexes, envy, and shortcomings. They will certainly try to transfer their negative image to you. Have you ever noticed that you are unfairly accused, name-calling, and gossip about non-existent moments? Thus, a woman projects her feelings and shortcomings on you because your positive character traits resonate sharply with her negative ones, which causes an inferiority complex, fear, and a feeling of loss of control over the situation.

6. She puts double meaning in words

She can say one thing, and by her tone, it will be possible to understand that she actually means the other. So, asking in a sarcastic tone, “Well, how are you?” you will, most likely, want to answer her with rudeness. After such an answer, it will be used against you. She will surely tell everyone around how bad your mood is and that you are a negative person, but she just asked how you are doing.

7. Blackmailing

For example, you want to find a new girlfriend, and your ex may worry that you are moving forward. She will not like it, and you will come across an ultimatum of this kind, “Either we are together, or I will tell her your secrets.” Of course, it may ruin your new relationships. So, dealing with ex-wife drama, you should be prepared for such things.

8. She strikes stealthily

Vindictive women like to act at the most inopportune moment, pouring out their “poison” precisely when you are at the peak of your energy (that is, in a good mood). With the words, “I don’t want to spoil the evening, but ...” or “I could keep silent, but...” the nastiest statements begin. And such women will surely spoil your evening with them and certainly will not be able to remain silent.

9. She lifts you to the top and then chops off the wings

A woman can give you compliments and put on a pedestal, and all this just to hurt you at the most unexpected moment for you. Such women well remember the phrase that the enemy needs to be kept closer to yourself than the friend, therefore, with the help of lies, they will try to earn your trust.

10. She is proud

Vindictive women are usually proud people who think that others attack them. This provokes a defensive stance that doesn’t contribute to the smooth operation of interpersonal relationships. Even though they show strengths, in reality, they show weakness because when a woman is confident in herself, she accepts the situation and moves forward.

How to Handle Ex-Wife Drama

Everyone went through a divorce or a breakup. For some, it was easy, someone had a hard time. But now you have a new girlfriend and don’t even think about your ex-wife. But still, she wants to be part of your life. What to do? How to deal with an angry ex-wife?

1. Stay indifferent

Dealing with a bitter ex-wife, you have to show her in every way that you don’t care about her. If she pursues you, starts conversations or gives you some gifts, then you should neither answer her questions nor accept gifts from her. You need to show with all your looks that you don’t need her anymore.

2. Talk to her

Sometimes it’s worth talking to your ex and explaining to her that everything has ended between you, and there can be nothing, you have a new girlfriend with whom you are very happy. However, as practice shows, such conversations often don’t lead to anything and may not help you in dealing with ex-wife. But still, you should try all methods.

3. Show her that you are happy

The third way to get rid of the annoying ex-wife is happiness. You have to show your ex-woman that you feel very good without her, and you are happy with your new woman. This may stop the ex. If you are single, then ask your female friend to pretend your girlfriend so that the picture of your happiness looks realistic.

4. Call the police

How to handle an ex-wife? When the situation gets out of hand, and it becomes like persecution, record all the threats and contact the police. Try to never be alone with her. These women often suffer from low self-esteem, and they don’t try to return their beloved, but enjoy self-pity. And having met with a serious rebuff, they retreat.

5. Ignore her

So, hope that one of these methods will help you get rid of your ex-wife. If not, then ignore her until she gets tired of getting you with her visits, meetings, and conversations. If you ignore all her attempts, then she will quickly get bored and will leave you alone soon. But it is best to initially avoid meeting people of this type so that it doesn’t outgrow from ordinary acquaintance to friendship or intimate relationships.

So, how to deal with a jealous ex-wife? There is no single method for getting rid of an ex-wife. As in any other business, an individual approach is needed here. Don’t feel sorry for her. If your ex is not able to let go of the situation, there is nothing sweet or sad about it. If she continues to spoil your life or bother you, she is wrong, and it is her fault.