How to Manage Your High Sex Drive

10.01.2019

The desire for sexual rapprochement, the so-called libido, is a special relationship between two people of the opposite sexes. It is something generic, not the nature or type of behavior (although, of course, there are exceptions, for example, situations where a man is guilty before a woman, and he promised to establish a short-term intimate relationship with her). Sexual drive is a special behavior of a man and a woman towards each other, the ultimate goal of healthy, sexually mature people who get mutual sexual satisfaction.

Some people believe (more often they are representatives of the older generation) that a person’s libido should not manifest itself in unbridled seizures. Sexual drive should always be controlled by consciousness, arise under the influence of a conscious attitude towards the representative of the opposite sex. It seems that nature wants one sex to perceive everything good and beautiful in the other. However, this perception is possible only with the ability to control oneself. After all, innate sexual instinct controls and regulates the libido that is sexual experiences that arise independently of consciousness. The formation of sexual attraction as a form of human sexual behavior, as well as the ability to manage it, is influenced by others (parents, educators, teachers), general culture and upbringing, social maturity, particular working and living conditions, etc.

Love provides the right to exercise morally healthy sexual desire. This sexual attraction is the expression of true love between a man and a woman. At the same time, we should not forget that sexual desire and love are not the same things. If the first is an innate, instinctive feeling and in a “pure” form is inherent only in animals, then the second is a feeling peculiar only to people. Love is a social phenomenon, it is a kind of superstructure over instinctive sexual desire. It is fuller and more beautiful than an animal sexual instinct. Healthy love includes sexual desire as an essential part, but it is not reduced to it. This is the joy that, making us sensitive to every life's beating, to every impression of being, indifferent to both physical and moral, develops and strengthens the body.

What's a high sex drive?

Often, the problem of an extremely high sex drive is characteristic of young people. This phenomenon is called pubertal hypersexuality when the human psyche is fixed on sexually erotic fantasies and impressions. This is due to the maximum age-related production of the sex hormone testosterone which boys have. Increased sexual excitability is accompanied by spontaneous erections, frequent wet dreams, and other manifestations. On the one hand, it generates nervous tension, and on the other hand, it helps the maturing person to form the awareness of his sexual role. It is necessary to ensure normal sexual functions in adulthood. But it happens that the problem of abnormally high sexual drive manifests itself in adult men and women.

The concept of "normal sexual desire" is conditional. Active sex life, which does not prevent a person from achieving success in other areas of life, is not the pathology. But if hypersexuality changes a person's behavior, and the need for numerous and diverse sexual contacts dominates other interests in life, then it is a question of sexual function disorder. Increased sexual desire is manifested in the imperative need of a person to change sexual partners, to have sexual intercourse for several days, to engage in sexual orgies and to perform demonstrative sexual acts. Pathological hypersexuality in men is called "satyriasis", and "nymphomania" in women.

What causes high sex drive

If at young age, hypersexuality is an independent problem, then at an older age it is a secondary manifestation of some underlying disease. The causes and signs of a high sex drive can be some organic, nervous, endocrine diseases, psychological or mental disorders:

• disorders of the hypothalamus, the structures of the brain as a result of neuroinfections (meningitis, encephalitis);
• traumatic or vascular lesions of the brain, brain tumors;
• hormonal disorders, hyperfunction of the adrenal cortex;
• drug intoxication and carbon monoxide poisoning;
• mental disorders (manic states, schizophrenia, personality disorder);
• psychological disorders (feelings of inferiority, self-doubt).

The disorder begins when excessive sexual activity makes a person compromise values and principles. For example, if a man really appreciates health, but at the same time masturbates so often that he does not get enough sleep chronically, this behavior can be called addiction.

The essence of the addiction is that the person suffering from it expresses his sexuality in such a way that it harms either himself or his relatives. Another aspect is secrecy: someone who suffers from this disorder keeps a secret double life, which their regular partner does not even suspect.

Addictive behavior can manifest itself in different ways: in excessive passion for pornography or sex chat rooms, in relations with strangers, and in adultery. In any case, it is important to deal with deep-seated reasons that make a dependent person behave this way. Sexual addiction can destroy healthy relationships with a partner, adversely affect physical health, lead to financial and career collapse. It activates the same “reward centers” in the brain as alcohol and drugs. Yes, you have to pay a considerable price for addiction, and that is why it is so important to find a way to get rid of the hidden shame deep inside by learning to understand yourself better. The problem is solved in most cases. High libido does not necessarily have to be an obstacle to healthy sexuality if you follow certain principles.

High sex drive in women

What is considered a high sex drive for a woman? Hypersexuality, or a high sex drive, occurs among the fair sex more often than you can imagine. Women with high sex drive possess an increased libido. Some women can have an increased sexual desire that may occur during menopause. The reason for this can be hormonal disorders and women's diseases. Such hypersexuality is more common for women who, in their youth, suffered from anorgasmia or stopped leading sex life.

The main reasons for provoking female hypersexuality are usually attributed, above all, to hormonal disruptions, including those caused by natural physiological processes. So, quite often this phenomenon occurs among teenage girls or pregnant women. Some chronic diseases, disorders of mental activity, taking certain medications can be provoking factors. In some cases, bouts of nymphomania may be caused by wearing too tight clothes — corsets, tight jeans, etc.

Female hypersexuality may occur after severe injuries, difficult childbirth, abortion, menopause. Often, the girls who started sexual life early suffer from nymphomania. In adulthood, the desire to have sex as much as possible is often associated with internal self-doubt, which decreases as a result of the appearance of a sense of self-worth and demand, even as a sexual object. The cause of hypersexuality during menopause is again hormones, but in this case, it goes by on its own in 1-2 years.

Nymphomania in the classical sense of the term is mainly found among women who in their youth rarely experienced an orgasm, or for one reason or another were forced to refrain from sexual contact for a long time. Girls with manifested hypersexuality, on the contrary, tend to experience several bright orgasms at a run, and in some cases, for a rather short stimulation of erogenous zones. Sometimes nymphomaniacs experience orgasm in completely non-standard situations, for example, when exposed to a jet of water or the feeling of vibration of a running car engine.

On the one hand, all this can be regarded positively. But the joy of their own hypersexuality can be obtained only if these doings coincide with the sexual temperament of the partner. Problems begin when satisfaction after each orgasm lasts for a few minutes or does not occur at all, and the beloved man does not even want to hear about making love. According to experts, if the increased libido does not prevent a woman from leading a full life, this is not a deviation from the norm. However, if the desire for sexual pleasure turns into an obsession, it can be a sign of serious illness.

High sex drive in men

The cause of a high sex drive in men is often a psychological disorder, which is based on a feeling of inferiority and lack of confidence in their sexual capabilities. The sources of this may be, for example, an unsuccessful first sexual intercourse. As a result, a man must continuously confirm his sexual viability, engaging in numerous sexual acts with different partners. Hypersexual men are constantly looking for partners for sex, but sexual intercourse does not bring them the expected satisfaction. They have a constant surplus of sex hormones in their blood, and they often manage to feel sexual saturation only after 3-4 sexual intercourses in a short time.

Addiction sufferers need to be aware of what really excites them and find a new way to realize their sexual impulses that will allow them to live a full life while maintaining healthy relationships. If you realize that you are suffering from this addiction, do not let your shame stop you from asking for help. It is very difficult to cope alone: the problem of many addicts lies precisely in the fact that they are not ready to share their experiences with anyone. It is because of the emotional closeness and shame that they hide the very existence of the problem and do not dare to seek treatment.